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Coffee Table Conversations with Tina Divina
Tina Divina
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Epilogue To An Affair

Epilogue To An Affair

We tried to not take it there
take two steps back
inhale the air

Pause.

This is the Epilogue to an Affair.
Not a fairytale story
no happy ending
just the results of lust
and infidelity blending.
There is no rescinding.
Let’s take it back to the beginning…

We tried to not take it there
take two steps back
inhale the air
exhale
but the thoughts impale
my conscience
I tried to hide
but still I find him
across the room
in the back of my mind
on the other end of my phone
finding the time
waiting in line
as if he were mine
never mind that I am titled
“Another’s”
Classified lovers
undiscovered
feeling invisible
within his embrace
feeling invincible
to the disgrace
still I know the case
as we hide in dark spaces
so no one can see our faces
as we chase the adrenaline
of getting caught
caught up in a web of lies
addicted to the high
wanting to feel it
getting careless by the minute
paranoid that he knows we did it
lying to him
saying I’m committed
walking away feeling acquitted
but yeah I did it
over here
and over there
adultery lingering in the air
we smell like sin
bathing in
our own deceit
he loves me
but I’m in too deep
the ice is cracking up under my feet
my lies are swallowing me
wallowing in regret
wishing I hadn’t really done it yet
trying to forget
and act like it hasn’t happened
dismiss the sweet taste of satisfaction
because this is merely a counteraction
to things that happened long ago
a woman forgives
but you never really know
how far she’ll go
just when you think she’s forgotten
and doesn’t care
you end up in the epilogue
to an affair.

Written by Tina Divina

Do two wrongs make a right? Hmm…. Ive heard men say, if you cheat. leave…. because she’s only going to put that in her back pocket and pull that card out later. Women…. do we truly forgive and forget and move on as if it never happened? Holla at me….

This is a part two to a poem I wrote and published and posted earlier called “Prelude To An Affair” if you dont remember it go back and read it again. =}

~TD

One Sided

One Sided

Holdin em Back

Before they stream down my face

How did I get to this place

This lopsided space

Of unsurety

Loving you has made me weak
I cant think
until I hear you speak
to start my day
to end my night
I fight with urges
surges of need

stifling resistance
resentment builds
and fills the greed
to have you wrapped up
next to me
it vexes me
perplexes me
how easily you walk away
with my vulnerability

on display
my humility a dismay
while inside I

beg you to stay
to lay and linger

a little longer

but my ego

pulls asunder
contradicting my hunger

growing stronger
while I chew upon

your appetizers
tides to tie me over
I sit in somber monotones
like a fiend
fiending my fix to come home
feeling in love all alone
stringing my hearts trombone
strung off of you
superglued to your hue
and walking in your shadow
not knowing which way to go
controlled by your effortless attempts
a simp
helpless at your beckon call
even if I didnt trip
I’d still fall

to your feet

feeling incomplete

without you next to me
wishing the domination subsided
in love with you
one sided

written by,

tina divina

We have all been through it, crushing on someone that doesn’t want us back, wishing, hoping that just maybe oneday……. that day never comes though. Eventually we get over it and move on.


Sweet Revenge is always when you see them years later and then they try to holla….only by then we forget why we ever were so interested.  Has this ever happened to any of you?

Are any of you crushing on someone that doesnt want you back? Or has put you in the “friend” box that you can never get out of?

Let me hear your stories…..Holla Back

~TD

For more thought provoking poetry, please check out my books “Coffee Table Conversations Volume I & II” available at a local bookstore near you or visit www.coffeetableconversations.com

An Ode To A Father…

An Ode To A Father…


I used to love em

but because of em

my patience is zero

too tired of waiting

for my hero

to walk through those doors

I just dont give a f*** anymore

I abhor liars

that falsely inspire

little girls

that one day

daddy’s coming home

finally facing it alone

from pre-teen to all grown

mad at my mom

for the reasons he’s gone

still she stayed strong

while I wander about

looking for solace in their eyes

hiding behind the disguise

playing off my insecurity

as she’s just shy

yet I

cling on to anything

showing me affection

leading me in the wrong direction

I don’t want to confess it

I miss him

but he turned his back

and didn’t look back

for fear of facing the facts

that was the choice he made

I fall in love, commit

then expect them to stray

or simply walk away

reverting back to that day

one single man

could’ve changed the way

I expected them to treat me

upgraded the way

they perceived me

receive me

as a lady

with confidence and security

all because

my Daddy loved me….

written by,

Tina Divina

To all the fatherless families, to the fathers that never learned from their own father how to be a daddy, this isn’t a male bash, this is a society clash, a lack of responsibility as our parents get younger and are learning less from example… we all need to make a difference. Holla if you hear me..

~Tina Divina

I AM HAPPY TO ANNOUNCE…. I AM NOW.. A PUBLISHED AUTHOR!!!! “Coffee Table Conversations Volumes I and II” are now available www.coffeetableconversations.com PLEASE GO NOW AND PURCHASE YOUR COPY!!Coffee Table Conversations, Volume I & II

A Woman Scorn

A Woman Scorn

Ironically
Words just sound
Like words to me
Seems absurd
But I’m not feeling
Very poetic
What once was so magnetic
I now regret it
I’m simply trying
Just to forget it
Let it burn
Take a breath
And let it breathe
like Beyonce’s “RESENTMENT”
“I’ve been crying for too long
What did you do to me”
You lied
You cheat
You’re no better than the last he
The lowest of lowest
Yeah, you now compete
(come close)
Cause I want you to hear me
I-AM-GOING-TO-FU-K-HIM


(And you know who him is)


F–K him the way
I used to f–k you
And no need to write a blog about it
I’m simply gonna shout it
Scream it from his room
So loud that you can hear……


………………………..me there


I’m gonna buy some

Sexy underwear
Let him stare
While I strip
Don’t even trip
Cause I remember
And I’ve  been thinking
You would make love to her…
Come home and talk love to me??
How could you be so weak
I painted you
A perfect picture
But now the
Writings on the wall
And you were never
Any of those things at all
You think these
Material things give me peace
Nucca please
I’d rather enjoy
Breaking them into pieces
And making them my profile pic
I’m feeling sick
Just thinking of you
I just want to get rid of you
Get you outta my system
Before i crash
You knew that it
Could never last
Yeah i’m rehashing
It all in my head
I believed that
bull$hit you said
You had me writing poems and $hit
Dedicating my world
to this nonsense
(I’m not even gonna mention my kid)
I’ll never forget what you did
You knew what you were doing
You had it all planned out
Your only fears
was that she’d find out
You were never worth it
Didn’t deserve it
My time
And dedication
Put me in
Such a messed up situation
You were selfish
And i was a fool
And now these are the last words
I’ll ever write of you

written by,
tina divina

************CHALLLLLLLLLENGGGEEEEEEE!!!************
MY LAST POEM CHALLENGE ASKED WHAT “LOVE IS”, WELL LETS FLIP IT…. MOST OF US THAT HAVE BEEN IN LOVE HAVE ALSO EXPERIENCED HEARTBREAK…..IN YOUR MOST DESCRIPTIVE WORDS, PLEASE PREPARE AN ORIGINAL POEM / RAP / SONG / SHORT STORY / OR PARAGRAPH THAT DESCRIBES THIS LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOO….

~TD

*I’m gonna post a quick disclaimer…. this is creative writing, I am still very much in LOVE.. lol. Yeah…talented I know.. haha * jokes … LET’S GO!!


Please check out my short film “Crazy in Love” its a 1 in 3 part series: www.youtube.com/divinerags and leave a comment. THANK YOU!

Marionette

Marionette

I was at mercy to his touch
he pulled me this way and such
he became my crutch
I hated that I loved him


*ahem*


liked him this much
he made me blush
in terra cotta, Persian red
I could barely hear the words he said
Instead I play pretend girlfriend
give him all the benefits
and none of the consequence
it makes no sense
but he makes me feel intense
and I dismiss commitment
and opt for temporary insanity
a future calamity
Surely he knows
he is my addiction
and I am a dope fiend
a mere puppet on a string.


written by,
~TD


How many of you are dating someone (or knows someone) that holds all the cards, you aren’t really moving forward yet you can’t let go??

You in fact are the puppet on the string….

I wanna hear from you….

************CHALLLLLLLLLENGGGEEEEEEE!!!************
AS WELL….. MY LAST POEM CHALLENGE ASKED WHAT “LOVE IS”, WELL LETS FLIP IT…. MOST OF US THAT HAVE BEEN IN LOVE HAVE ALSO EXPERIENCED HEARTBREAK…..IN YOUR MOST DESCRIPTIVE WORDS, PLEASE PREPARE AN ORIGINAL POEM / RAP / SONG / SHORT STORY / OR PARAGRAPH THAT DESCRIBES THIS AND WE WILL ALL POST OURS ON THE NEXT BLOG… LETS GET  TO WRITING….

~TD

Please check out my short film “Crazy in Love” its a 1 in 3 part series: www.youtube.com/divinerags and leave a comment. THANK YOU!

Love Is….. (Poem Challenge)

Love is…..

More than a four letter word
it is a verb
its how you act
its what you do
its saying sorry just because….
Baby I heart you

Love is throwing away like
and replacing it with the real
not being afraid of what you feel
Love is waiting on “Him”
to seal the deal
it is never wanting
to say goodbye
wanting to cry
just because you feel so blessed
asking the man above
if this is just a test
love is loving me at my best
and at my worst
it is loving myself
and knowing my worth

Love is remembering
the dimples in her smile
she’d laugh so hard it hurt
Love is never wanting to see her hurt
wishing everyone I knew met her
before she past (Grammy I miss u)
wishing the time would last
wondering where everyone went so fast…

Love is not a clash of two lives
but the homogenizing into one heart
love fills up every part
jumpstarts passion to adoration to bliss
to you can’t really pinpoint what this is
but it feels so good
you want to linger in this….

Love is feeling
her tiny fingers on my face
Amazed
looking at her in disbelief
in awe of what God has given me
my mini me
and she mimics me
in the best of ways
makes every day
worth living for…

Love is knowing his flaws and
loving him that much more
feeling adored
Love is opening the door
and knowing he will come back to me
for love brings him back to me
Love is doing nothing
and feeling like you have everything

Love knows forgiveness
but has a mistress named lust
love is uninhibited
unrestricted
yet still requires your trust
love is sometimes un-reciprocated
anticipated unadulterated
sometimes we hate it
it holds no promises
and is uncontrolled
but what a lovely thing
when we let go
and let love show us the way
love is when seeing each other
is the highlight of your day
because he makes everything ok
it is tangled and muddled
but within the huddle
and amongst the shuffle
through all the trouble
there is love
and that makes it all go round
turns meaningless life around
makes it all worthwhile
could be the simple
love of a child
or of a lover
a sister
a mother
there is no recipe or equation
no medical evaluation
no scientific proof
it actually exists
it just is

Love is…..

written by,
tina divina

Now everyone post your poems, raps/ songs, verses, whatever your interpretation is..there is NO RIGHT OR WRONG way to say it….we all are ready and wanting to hear what your version of “love is”

Holla at me,

TD

P.S. If there is nothing else we do in this world….remember to Love and allow yourself to be loved otherwise you aren’t living.

Restitution, Reparation, and Other “R” Words

Restitution, Reparation, and Other “R” Words

Lets call it Restitution
a dissolution to the Resentment
I feel inside
for all the times you lied
for all the nights I cried
and questioned why
you Realize
after you did
what you did
you gave me permission
to go and f**K him
(Oh yes you did)
and from there
Reparation has begun
Its not any fun
Huh?
Cause what you did
I done….
But no need to question
or Rack your brain
for feeling intuitions
driving you insane
no need to check
my text messages
or my MySpace
I’m simply gonna tell it
to your face
for your disgrace
yeah……I did it
to pay you back
let you play it back
like one slow
tortuous track
let it Rack your mind
for all the nights
you were suppose to be mine
let me give you something
to sit on your mind
for one night
I was his
close your eyes
and imagine the kiss
his fingers all on my skin
then only
can you begin
to know my Rage
wallowing in
this little pitiful cage
just trying to get past…..
I may forgive you
but the memory will last
stuck in my mind
like a kodak flash
an eye for an eye
a tooth for a tooth
a tit for a tat
yeah it went down
something like that
my get outta jail free card
I thank you for that…..
not that we’re even
but lets forget the facts
and feel the pain
Retain the lesson
ignore the blame
its all the same
you do to me
and I’ll do it to you
an eye for an eye
a tooth for a tooth.

written by,
tina divina

Ok so tell me, do you think when someone cheats on you, it gives you free reign to go out and do the same? I’ve heard this…. I’ve heard men say “yo… if you cheat and get caught, leave because you will drive yourself insane thinking she is gonna get you back”…..

and vice versa, men cheat, women cheat, we just got our game better….lol. (I’m joking, but I’m serious…LOL) but tell me, once a cheat always a cheat? Or can we learn from our mistakes and move on… further more as the “Cheated upon” why is there the need to “Get Back”?? and what happens after that?

Holla at me,
~TD

I. Am.

I. AM.

I am
The sun
That glides across
Your face
When you wake
I am the space
Between daylight
And nightfall
I am probable cause
I am all
That you dream
And when it seems
You are on the wrong path
I am there
To take your hand
I am
The reason
You are here
And not there
Even when its not fair
I am
Everywhere
I am
Your last breath of air
I am
The answer
And the question
I am the lesson
I am
Circumstance
Karma
And consequence
I am kismet
I am an
Imminent moment in time
I am
The reason you are alive
(that you strive)
I am
Stress
I am
Strife
I am death
And life
Your destiny
Your smile
Your frown
What turned the day around
I am love
And heart ache
I am the turn
In the road you take
I am addiction
And prediction
I am
What is already written
I am every action
And reaction
I am the distraction
In your ear
That lil voice that you hear
That draws you near
I am the next move that you make
There is no escape
I am
FATE.

written by,
tina divina

Fate: Something that unavoidably befalls a person, no matter their actions, it was meant to happen and you and I are right where we are suppose to be, or are we? Is it fate that makes a man homeless, causes a mother to bury her own child, offers treasures to the vain, and hardship to the hard-worker, is it fate that brought you here, to this blog, how will this piece fit, in your puzzle of life…..do you control your destiny?? Do you believe in FATE??? ~TD

Hurry Up And WAIT!!

changeisnow_468x60

Hurry Up and………WAIT

All of our lives
we’ve been taught
to wait
that good things come
to those
who…….
WAIT…
wait til nightfall
wait til morning rises
wait for the reveal
beneath the disguises
wait til it warms
wait til it gets cold
wait when your young
wait til you get old
wait for sex
wait for love
wait til he steps down
from the heavens above
wait til they see me
wait for a sign
wait for the pain to go away
wait for time
wait for the rain to stop
wait for the right opportunity
wait for the ball to drop
wait in continuity
wait for a raise
wait to heal
wait til it pays off
wait til you feel it
wait til its over
wait for it to begin
wait til it comes out
wait til it ends
wait for Christmas
wait for summer
wait til you just can’t wait any longer
and the hunger
grows stronger
and we wait for change
and then oneday we wake
and nothing is the same
and our dreams touch reality
and our what if’s come to end
and the waiting is finally over
and the Revolution begins.

And we begin again….

written by,
tina divina

We waited a long time for this moment….. and today we celebrate our President Barack Obama’s 100th day in office. We begin Again…. because of him, the Change is NOW!!

I’d love to hear what this day means to you,
Holla at me,
~TD

Change is Now- Download on iTunes

Change is Now- Download on iTunes

Anomalies

Anomalies

Tiny discrepancies
or imperfections
whether clandestine
or overt
they anoint us diverse
or otherwise perfectly

UNIQUE

mapping our originality
He loves me
and all of my idiosyncrasies
even down to my ugly feet
the fact that I never shut up
but I know when NOT to speak
the way my accent falls somewhere between
A Jewish-New-Yorker
and a valley girl
from the beach
He knows that I
laugh when I’m nervous
that I am impervious to tickles
Still he trickles his fingers
to that one place
the way I say  that’s funny

completely straight faced

the parts of my body that I hate
the scar on my neck
from the 4th grade
the fact that I sway when we hug
my childish panic with bugs
the crooked way I talk
the way I walk so confident
yet am ridiculously clumsy
that I still call my mother  Mommy
the birthmark on my inner thigh
that is slightly lighter than I
that while the life of the party

I still get shy

the fact that I’ve proudly mastered
picking up items with my toes  (Shh, don’t tell no one)
that I’m anti-roses
but am all for flowers that are wild
that I embrace my inner child
so much that if I
didn’t have a daughter
I’d still watch cartoons
that I am in awe of a full moon
and fear there maybe Werewolves
or other things that lurk in the gloom
lightning makes me quiver
and Sci-fi just may be real
I have a lack of tact
when it comes to how I feel
But he knows the deal
and still he loves me
and all of my
Anomalies

written by
tina divina

What is Love??

Love is loving me and alllllllllll of my idiosyncrasies, all of the little things that make me.. “ME”.

Its also about, me being comfortable enough with myself to allow  someone to see my “Imperfect-ness”.

So very truthfully, in this poem I have listed at least 10 of my imperfections that make me perfect and I embrace them… even love them, please share with me  a few of yours.

~TD

Also Make sure you check out: STEVIE WONDER’S INSPIRATIONAL SINGLE “ALL ABOUT THE LOVE AGAIN”

You can see the new video here: www.youtube.com/watch?v=amAWRHdWoEk

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